Things I wish were better

So, in the spirit of my list-style blogging, here's some of the things in life that have let me down:

1) Low fat Moosetracks ice cream - The only reason I eat Moosetracks is for the chocolate (not liquid fudge, but real solid chocolate) swirls. And do you know how they decrease the fat in this healthier version? By decreasing the chocolate. Disappointing.

2) My white aviators - there's nothing that sucks more than reaching for the coolest $5 sunglasses in the world and realizing, once again, that they are irreparably crooked. Or your ears are crooked, whatever. Both have the same effect.

3) Coffee - Every time I think, "Maybe this time I'll like coffee. Maybe this time it won't make my stomach freak out and my hands shake, and it won't be so terribly bitter. Maybe this time I'll get the whole 'coffee thing.' Maybe I've just always done it wrong before." And each time I, as my stomach tries to reject it, I realize that nothing has changed.

4) Ground beef - Maybe it's just me, but every since I was a kid, I thought the smell of ground beef in a skillet was just about the best thing ever. Don't get me wrong, it tastes alright, too, but for some reason, it never lives up to the way it smells.

5) Job interviews - Oh, they love you, you have all the right experience, and you even made them laugh. And yet, though they promised they'd call, they never do. Like a bad boyfriend, really.

6) Mixed CDs - I spend all this time compiling all the best songs in my itunes so I never have to flip channels or listen to commercials again. But as soon as I put the CD in, I'm dying for the spontaneity of the radio station. Just me? Just me.

7) Water parks - You remember how cool they were when you were a kid, how you would see them on TV and beg your parents to let you go. It's like the neighbor's pool on steroids. What you don't remember is all the fat hairy people and floating band aids. Yeah...ew.

8) Hair products - They tantalize us with these fabulous photos of curl, volume, shine color, whatever. They promise the world. And then you fork out $15 for it, only to find it's exactly the same as the stuff you already use, and the hair you saw in the mirror yesterday is the same hair you're seeing today. Bummer...

9) The Great Outdoors - Admit it, you agree. If it's not too hot, it's too cold, too humid, too windy, too sunny, too rainy, or too buggy. You get all excited for some "fresh air" and dang it if it's not the same stuff you were just breathing inside, with bug bites and sunburn thrown in just for fun. Cynical? Maybe. But you know it's true.

10) And finally, my own personal weakness: peanut butter - it's so dang good...until you stand on the scale.